Service With a Smile

I’m a slacker. But what else is new? The fact that my last post was almost ten months ago…I’m sad to report not much has changed. I’m still a bank teller without my math degree (though I hope to change that in the coming weeks), in debt and loving my lack of a social life. Wait, what? Okay, maybe that last one was a lie. But when the only semblance of a social life one gets is from the workplace—especially when the workplace consists of a lot of customers who may or may not get upset with you whether or not you’re to blame—not having to socialize with others outside of work may be considered a blessing. Or the life of a hermit.

But maybe I was already leaning towards the hermit-ite lifestyle. Who really enjoys socializing with a self-proclaimed math geek? Actually, I don’t know the answer to that question. Nor do I care. So what if I’m a math geek? In fact, I had a co-worker who asked me in shock, “Why would you say something like that about yourself? That’s depressing.” . . .  I never knew being a geek was considered “depressing”. And if so, most of my friends (if not all) who proudly declare their geek pride have some of the most entertaining social lives. They would consider being a geek the opposite of dull and depressing. But hey, to each his or her own.

So while I’m subjected to this lonely social life—or lack thereof—I actually don’t mind as much as others might. However, I do occasionally wish I had friends who lived closer so that I could see them and blow off some steam. And then we would go on slushie runs (which have been the source of endless entertainment and philosophical discussions). So while I’m stuck in the middle of nowhere (at least, that’s what it seems like to me what with most of the people I know scattered throughout the country), I have to relieve some of the stress I accumulate. Because while I enjoy my job as a bank teller on most days, it can be tedious (and sometimes even frustrating when you are accused of being a racist by a customer just because you were doing your job).

Which brings me to the following scenarios. Because there are times when customers try to be witty (although it’s not nearly as original as they believe), and I want to say something witty in return. But my wit is not very spontaneous. This is probably why I’m a math major and not an English Lit student. So now I’m praying for the day when the right kind of customer comes to my window and is willing to play along.

Me: Can I do anything else for you today?
Customer: You could shoot me out of my misery.
Me: My apologies, sir. Unfortunately, I only commit acts of felony against persons with six legs and exoskeletons.

Me: What else can I do for you?
Customer: You could just throw an extra $100 bill in there.
Me: *snap fingers* If only I hadn’t given the last of my Monopoly play money to the customer who asked me the same thing earlier. Maybe next time.

Now I wouldn’t really say this, no matter how much I would really like to. Mostly because customers never get a chance to get to know my personality. But I’ll share it with all of you nonexistent blog readers and followers.

Customer: How’s it going?
Me: What’s ‘it’? The stock market? The price of tea in China? My plans for world domination? Swimmingly, thanks for asking. As soon as the man-eating hamsters are genetically developed, I’ll be able to implement phase Jellyfish. But only after the platypuses or platypi are eradicated.”

Okay, so I’m a little random. No one ever said being random was a bad thing. Right? *crickets chirping*

Oh! I know this is really late (I distract easily, all right?), but here’s a picture of the mathiest Christmas presents I’ve ever received in my life. My family has finally figured me out. Took them long enough. ;D Don’t worry fam, I love you long time.

Well, I’m off to brainstorm more ideas for a senior project so I can actually graduate this year. And maybe procrastinate some as I try to write stories and/or record songs, while doing my best not to obsess over fandoms, new and old. Essentially perpetuating my existence as a reclusive geek.

A geek who is trying her best not to take her shiny new Prius out for a joy ride.

Allonsy!