What has a head and a tail but no body? A coin.
Why did the football coach go to the bank? To get the quarter back.
What makes math such hard work? All those numbers you have to carry.
What did one math book say to the other? "Man, I have a lot of problems!"
What kind of foods do math teachers eat? Square meals.
What comes once in a minute, once in a month, but never in a day? The letter M.
Why shouldn't you take your computer into rush-hour traffic? Because it might crash (especially if it's Vista).
Why couldn't the girl type on her computer? She lost her keys.
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher? She couldn't control her pupils.
What do pigs put in their hard drives? Sloppy disks.
What's a teacher's favorite candy? Chalk-olate.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Calculus Valentine
I realize I'm a little late in posting this, but I've been waiting an entire year to use this (and I'd rather not wait another 362 days).
“You disintegrate my differential,
You dislocate my focus.
My pulse goes up like an exponential
Whenever you cross my locus.
Without you sets are null and void,
So won’t you be my cardioid?”
“You disintegrate my differential,
You dislocate my focus.
My pulse goes up like an exponential
Whenever you cross my locus.
Without you sets are null and void,
So won’t you be my cardioid?”
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Various math-related jokes (among other things)
What does Santa say?
"Null hypothesis, null hypothesis, null hypothesis!" (Ho, Ho, Ho!)
Credit goes to my friend from my statistics class. For all you non-math people (and even some math people), the Ho is pronounced 'H-null', and represents the null hypothesis for a statistics test.
Who made King Arthur's Round Table?
Sir Cumference
And now here's some random facts that I learned in my proof-writing class:
-Lewis Carroll (author of Alice in Wonderland) was really a mathematician. His books Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass are filled with tons of mathematical logic (will find some examples sooner or later).
-The song "The 12 Days of Christmas" does not mean the person gets 12 or 78 gifts. No, this 'true love' gives 364 gifts. Who knew the song was about sequences? Someone had too much eggnog, as well as too much time and money on his or her hands...and apparently was a math geek on top of that.
More flair!
"Null hypothesis, null hypothesis, null hypothesis!" (Ho, Ho, Ho!)
Credit goes to my friend from my statistics class. For all you non-math people (and even some math people), the Ho is pronounced 'H-null', and represents the null hypothesis for a statistics test.
Who made King Arthur's Round Table?
Sir Cumference
And now here's some random facts that I learned in my proof-writing class:
-Lewis Carroll (author of Alice in Wonderland) was really a mathematician. His books Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass are filled with tons of mathematical logic (will find some examples sooner or later).
-The song "The 12 Days of Christmas" does not mean the person gets 12 or 78 gifts. No, this 'true love' gives 364 gifts. Who knew the song was about sequences? Someone had too much eggnog, as well as too much time and money on his or her hands...and apparently was a math geek on top of that.
More flair!
Friday, December 5, 2008
The randomness that is multivariable calculus
When learning about derivatives, eat cake.
When learning about double integrals, eat more cake.
When learning about triple integrals, eat ice cream.
Constructive vs. Destructive (SMASH Z FIRST!!!! Or not...)
When learning about flux, eat twinkies (leave the twinkie).
The vector field of gravity is EVIL.
The divergence of vector F (F being the vector field of gravity) centered where (x,y,z) is not equal to (0,0,0) is 0. At the origin it is undefined.
The gradient of a vector determines the potential...if there's no potential, it's not gonna work out:
Guy to his date says, "It was fun, but this rotational vector field has no potential."
And this is what happens in a calc class...full of econ majors and only 5 math majors.
When learning about double integrals, eat more cake.
When learning about triple integrals, eat ice cream.
Constructive vs. Destructive (SMASH Z FIRST!!!! Or not...)
When learning about flux, eat twinkies (leave the twinkie).
The vector field of gravity is EVIL.
The divergence of vector F (F being the vector field of gravity) centered where (x,y,z) is not equal to (0,0,0) is 0. At the origin it is undefined.
The gradient of a vector determines the potential...if there's no potential, it's not gonna work out:
Guy to his date says, "It was fun, but this rotational vector field has no potential."
And this is what happens in a calc class...full of econ majors and only 5 math majors.
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